Yesterday I celebrated hitting a major milestone of hitting my initial weight loss goal at Biker Barre. I say initial because when I walked into Sainted Mary’s office I had two goals. One was a specific size of clothing and the other was a specific number on the scale. As this process has gone along I wanted to lower the number on the scale by an additional 10 pounds. Sainted Mary said no. Her reasoning and rationale was strong, “With all of the crazy hiking, running, and other stuff that you do you need all of the muscle you can get and if we start taking too much off you are going to start loosing muscle.” I may have been a bit of a brat, but after hiking over 20 miles last weekend in Colorado at altitude and not batting an eye I must begrudgingly admit that she has a valid point. While I have 5 more pounds to go to hit my second weight loss goal she and I have decided to take this second set of weight a bit more slowly.
The funny thing is as I sat there sweating my ass off with some of the most influential people that I have had in my life over the last year who have encouraged me, cajoled me, and smacked me into reality when I have needed it I really don’t feel any different. I still feel like that fat girl who decided a year ago that she needed to get her shit together. I still feel like the fat girl. Which is ironic when you consider even when I was carrying around an extra 53 pounds I still hiked, ran, kayaked, and did everything else I do now. I just did it much much slower.
It’s not until I put clothes on or I see new pictures of myself that I truly realize just how much things have changed. Yesterday a good girlfriend of mine, Shooter Girl, gave me a huge bag of her “baggy” clothes. They were size 6s. I scoffed when I told her there was no way that those were going to fit me. After spin class (and a shower) I started to slip on some of the pants never in a million years did I think they would actually fit. HOLY BISCUITS AND GRAVY!! Who IS this person????
Now I know that size doesn’t define a person, but when you haven’t been a size 6 since middle school it certainly is a defining moment. This would also explain why everything is falling off of me, but I digress….
What this 53 pound weight loss has allowed me to do is to do all of the things that I love to do, but take them to the next level. I’m still adjusting to this new body with all of it’s new bones and new muscle, but I’m hoping that eventually I will figure it all out. Oh, and I’ll stop pulling bigger clothes off of the rack than I should be wearing. In the mean time I finally got fitted for a bra. I went from a 38D to a 34C. To quote a dear friend of mine, “That’s a lot of lost boobage.”